Dan Frank

Arthritic Jaw

2009-08-25T08:02:00.000-07:00

Shut Up!

Evergreen

2009-08-10T02:00:00.000-07:00

Oh God

There's a bogey on my lip

I didn't pick

properly.

It stuck before the flick

and I have failed again.

Selfish Orphan

2009-08-04T09:07:00.000-07:00

My mother abandoned me for a jerk with a junk filled needle.

I pillared and posted through childhood and a fostered adolescence.

I drank too much cider and thought the heartburn poignant.

Then I decided to fuck a fat woman.

I liked the lack of bones. I liked the way she rummaged through my baggage for treats.

I liked that she had tiny self esteem and would drip on my every word and this gave me back some of the power I had lost through being brought up by bureaucracy.

I killed my fat woman when I put weight on.

The balance wasn't the same.

CaBBage

2009-08-01T13:03:00.000-07:00

It stinks.
Boiled
Like England’s rolling
Bitter greens

Some hate full plate
Dashed with weak meat
And village idiots
Smirking at my puny marrow

At times like these
I are carnivore.
Stuck in the cut
Thin with gravy

If I could muster Dutch giblets
I’d be buried bones and
Over after eights
Slice in to martyrdom

I said no but

When the cow came home,
Wet browed with jellied heels,
I tried for just milk
But met with udder emptiness

So here glut us
Stomachs touching spines
Bloating up the afternoon
Faking Sunday smiles

Skinny Scally

2009-07-22T17:24:00.000-07:00

Skinny Scally

Keep your pigeon chest away from me

Please

I can't bear white socks

and secretly

I know you play piano.

2009-07-21T09:35:00.000-07:00

I Shit Therefore I am

Secretly I feast on pigs and liver. Crammed cheeks chewing, the pale pork juices are warmer than my mouth. It slides downwards. Beast's flesh within Beast's flesh and I am man. I am triumphant. I have confirmed my temporary existence by consuming another temporary being. And once my selfish body removes all it needs from the meat it will expel the waste in a blaze of satisfying self-smell.

Inhaling deeply I put down the shampoo bottle and focus closer on the Turd(s) I have dropped onto shining, bleached porcelain.

The smell arrives all at once, but after a more detailed sniff I begin to sense the different levels of odour forming in my lucky nostrils. Eyes down, I try to identify each scent and relate it to a different part of my being.

The first layer, superficial. Hints at what I ate. I remember mangled meat slipping past the tongue and stroking the edges of my inner pipes. Now it returns. Haunting me from beyong the bowel. Reminding me that this beast of God had no choice in prolonging my life. I think twice before giving thanks to the hog. He did me no favours.

Yet there are more depths to my odour. Another scent confirms my very existence. I am like the worm, who constantly eats mud then shits this mud out the otherside to move along in the ground. This smell screams:

"You're still shitting son, as long as you keep shitting you'll live."

I long for constipation.

And then some split second maternal instinct kicks and runs. My faecal foetus is screaming. Screaming with it's smell. Floating. Bobbing. What a waste.

What a waste of an oppurtunity to eat more vegetation, drink more water and exercise my bloated body. Ah...so the next scent is guilt. Should have done things differently. Could of had a smaller one. A healthier one. One with better memories.

I desperatley spray air freshner but underneath it lingers. Singing my secrets from the bowl:

"He eats. He eats carbs after six. He cares not what he consumes. He can't control himself. He is first in the buffet queue and last in the gym. We all know you eat Dan."

I choke on the smell of my own regret.

I read the shampoo bottle, trying to distract, trying to take my nose off the scent. But it doesn't work. The only way I could escape would be to cover my own nose. But that strikes me as somewhat ridiculous. Covering one's own nose to block out the smell of one's own excrement?

I'm only too keen to wipe. Extra hard, ripping out hairs as penance for my sins. Instinctively I check the used four pieces of two-ply roll (folded over twice for strength and durability) to make sure all is well. And yes. Thank God, no abnormalities, I have survived another day on this planet and this passing of matter is an acheivement and confirmation of that.

I flush and I am hungry.